Loctor Mayat's Autopsy

Please visit LoctorMayat.com

... and refresh your links. Thanks! :D

Woa ha ha ha....

I've received the email and notice.

This blog will be shutdown soon.

Thanks for your support.

Love,
Loctor Mayat & Robert H. Johnson

Okay.. have to deal with the fact that Christmas is just a few days away. I still don't know what I need to get for my family.

Heck.. I don't even know what I should get for Mrs Mayat. But then, we are planning on a trip to a seaside resort pretty soon. Other than that, I'm not sure what I need to get her. Any help girls???

So for my mum, ermm... errr......... I also don't know la.. die die die.

As for my father, I sort of know what to get him...



Heh heh...

It's really hard to get gifts for your family. Aiyoh-yoh....

Yesterday as I was going through the stuff in my parent's TV cabinet, I noticed that one of the wrist watch that father owns is very familiar. I know I've seen it somewhere before until I realize that it's a damn SEIKO 5!!!

Ha ha ha....

Mrs quickly went to my father and told him I've been rumaging through his personal belongings. When father came, he told me to take it. WOW WEEE~!!!



Aah, after several years of wear, the watch is still in good condition but scratches are evident.



However, it looks really nice...





And it's heavy metal too!



And no, it's not Petaling Street RM20 version..



Last I check this model is going for USD100++. Wah lau eh... damn stim

Don't you wish your ass is as hot like mine~? Donch ya? Donch Ya?

Click Play to listen:




I’m bringing sexy back
Them other boys donno know how to act
I think your special whats behind your back
So turn around and ill pick up the slack.

Take em’ to the bridge

Dirty babe
You see these shackles
Baby I’m your slave
I’ll let you whip me if I misbehave
It’s just that no one makes me feel this way

Take em' to the chorus

Come here girl
Go ahead, be gone with it
Come to the back
Go ahead, be gone with it
VIP
Go ahead, be gone with it
Drinks on me
Go ahead, be gone with it
Let me see what you’re twerkin with
Go ahead, be gone with it
Look at those hips
Go ahead, be gone with it
You make me smile
Go ahead, be gone with it
Go ahead child
Go ahead, be gone with it
And get your sexy on
Go ahead, be gone with it

Get yo' sexy on

I’m bringing sexy back
Them other fuckers don’t know how to act
Come let me make up for the things you lack
Cause your burning up I gotta get it fast

Take em’ to the bridge

I’m bringing sexy back
You mother fXXkers watch how I attack
If that’s your girl you better watch your back
Cause she’ll burn it up for me and that’s a fact

Take em’ to the chorus


p/s: WOA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA ~~~~~!!!

Click Play to... ermm.. play


Uuuoooaaaaahhh~~~!!
That's the start, the middle, and the end
Aren't you glad the universe pretends
If I don't get this message home
Once again I'm gonna hate alone
Ride with me
Ride with me
Ride with me, Oh
Ride with me
Ride with me
Ride with me unless youuuuuuuuuuuuuu..............

WOOOAHHHH ARGGGGH AOOOOOOOOOUUUU~!!!

Bored aloud ignore the right to be
Invite me down because we like to see
The colours through your loaded mind
Fuck the world and liberate our time

Ride with me
Ride with me
Ride with me, Oh
Ride with me
Ride with me
Ride with me, OH

I'm not waiting a long life
I'm not waiting alone

Ride with me
Ride with me
Ride with me home
Ride with me
Ride with me
Ride with me home

Accidents and unwanted incidents may happen anytime & anywhere without warning. It is good to have insurance for the people we care for, and also for the things we love.

Most people have life insurance or personal accident insurance. Some parents buy education insurance for their kids. There are also people who buy insurance for the things they love like their Apple Computer, golf clubs, jewellery, etc.

Today, we can also insure our own body parts just in case something bad happens to it:



Yeap.... you'll just never know. Zipper malfunction, faulty urinal, jamban seats than drop down suddenly, the list is endless.

Get one, to have peace of mind.

A major problem of photographers is that they shoot blurry photos. The main reason why the photos are blurry is because the shutter speed is too low. For Loctor, anything slower than 1/30 seconds is considered slow.

Hence, a tripod is necessary to prevent camera shakes. But sometimes, in some situations, carrying a tripod is not easy and some places just don't permit you to lug around a 2kg Manfrotto or even a 500grams Sakure tripod.

Don't worry, let's analyze a few techniques which will help you:

#1: The Upskirt Technique

No tripod and afraid of camera shake? What the heck, just lie on the ground! The center of gravity of your body is literally touching the ground hence you have all the stability you need. Also known as the pintai-lou technique. Girls wearing skirt should be aware of photographers using this technique.

#2: The Stomach Support

For those lucky enough to have a belly. Place your elbows on the belly and you can achieve tremendous improvements in camera stability. This technique however, does not apply to thin and fit people like Stupe. (Woa ha ha ha)

#3: The Pentapod

Tripods have three legs to support your camera. So, more legs will have more support. Unfortunately, nobody in the world manufactures any camera support that has more than 3 legs. Don't worry, if you can't find it, make one yourself! There is no better extra support than your own legs.


How do you achieve the Pentapod technique? Place your camera on the tripod, then hold the camera firmly with your hands and then spread your legs as wide as possible. Easy as 1 2 3!

#4: The Sky Cam

If you have a tripod, it is extremely hard to shoot photos that has the point of view as if you're looking down from the sky (hence, the term 'Sky Cam'). So fret not, find any nearby tree, climb it, and shoot. Make sure you find strong branches to lean on.



So that's it! 4 easy to learn techniques for you photographers suffering from slow shutter speed issues.

Enjoy!


p/s: WOA HA HA HA HA HA HA....
p/s2: Thanks to Mackie for the pics

Yesterday, the one who lost his brains, Zybisko14 finally came over to Penang to meet up with me and also to collect his D50 ;)

After showing him the basics on how to handle the camera, we got off straight to Penang to get a tripod. However...


*pic taken by Zybisko

Stupid Queensbay Mall... causing massive jam everywhere... !! @#&*@^&

Once we got on the ferry, we got out from the car and started shooting









So finally we did reach Penang island, got the tripod and headed to the Botanical Gardens for some photography practice. :D


check out those eyes of the baby monkey man... ha ha ha








Zybisko shooting the stream with his hold-my-breath-for-3-seconds-shutter-speed technique



So anybody else wanna come over for some shooting with Loctor? :D

WOa ha ha ha ha ha...

When I was thinking of where to get my new camera body, I was juggling between the usual camera shop that I always go to in Penang OR buying via online.

The prices for both is just a mere RM50 difference but if you want to say cheap, also cannot lah. Both about the same. Anyhow, I made up my mind to order my camera directly from Shashinki website, the Malaysian Online Camera Shop:


*click on Logo to enter Shashinki

The website was launched 1 year ago by a Malaysian who currently resides in Japan. Hence, some of the stuff sold in Shashinki are actually sourced from Japan... like my camera ;)

The company is a Malaysian registered company based in Ayer Tawar, Perak. From this office, the stuff that you ordered will be sent via Poslaju.

If you go through the website, there are lots of camera-related stuff on sale. A plus side is that you can check out the prices in a few currencies. You need to register yourself at Shashinki (and it's free) before you can make your order.


Payment wise is very flexible. You can either write a cheque, perform cash deposit, Maybank2U (or other online banking site) or pay with your credit card via PayPal service.

Now... If you would like to pay via PayPal. Please bear in mind that you will be paying in USD ONLY. The best method IMHO is to pay via direct deposit or online banking. These times, I wish I have a Tigerbank account so I can use that Maybank2U. It's just not very safe to carry ~RM2k++ of cash for cash deposit. Heh heh heh...

Now, what can I say about customer service? One word --> EXCELLENT!

The site owner replies all your enquiries very fast and he's very helpful too. Sometimes, you might get some free gifts from him too! :D Woa ha ha ha... I got a free Matin neck strap together with the camera. Stim nyerr..


So after making your payment. You will get confirmation email from Shashinki and also the status of the shipment. If no stock they will let you know when the stock will arrive and when are you going to receive it. You have yourself to blame for not checking your email :D For things that are in stock, usually you will get it the next day via Poslaju. If not, it's usually within a week or so. Very good man!

As a comparison, last year I made an online order from the "brand of bags that I like" store. After my payment has been confirmed, there is no news at all for 2 freaking weeks. Not even an email or a phone call. Tiu!! So after emailing them, only I found out that they have no stock! Man I was furious! Immediately I cancelled my order and would never buy from their online store again.

So back to Shashinki...

When you receive your goods via PosLaju, you will have peace of mind because these guys really take the effort to wrap your stuff carefully. My camera box is within a bigger box which is filled with styrofoam, plastic bubbles, pop-pop wrappers (ha ha ha... don't know what to call them). Your box won't be damaged man!

Aah... bear in mind that if you buy a camera from Japan, you will get everything in Japanese language. Ha ha ha... No worries, the English version of the user manual is just a download away.

I admit that some of the prices in the website are quite expensive as compared to the shops. Well, bear in mind that if you buy from Shashinki, you do everything from the comfort of your own home right in front of the PC. With the exception that you may need to go to the bank to deposit the $$$. So, don't be so kiamsiap laa.. okay?

In conclusion, Loctor Mayat highly recommend Shashinki.com to you guys and girls who like to get your camera needs. If you don't see what you want in the website, just contact him! :D